Category: humour

Like many of the irish population I listen to the Last Word on Today FM regularly while travelling home from work. Today I managed to catch a section on the Lonely Planet guide’s description of certain Irish towns and counties. A link to the press release on the Irish section of the guide can be found here
The section was typically Dublin focussed with most of the interview covering the guide’s comments about Temple Bar. Lads, you’ll never achieve any decentralisation if you don’t educate the pale about the rest of the country. Surely it’s worth pointing out there are places where you can get to work in under an hour without having a multi-million euro mortgage and a helicopter.
However, at the end they mentioned the comments about Waterford.

Waterford Town: “Although that seedy port-town feel is still evident in places, the city has received a facelift in recent years. Pedestrianised streets and public artworks have improved the centre, and it’s now a more attractive place to wander.” (P184)

Now, this back-handed and cack-handed complement is typical of the bluster that the editor Justin Bambridge tried to defend on Matt’s show. He made vague references to “proper research” but couldn’t articulate what this really consisted of. There are not “seedy places” in Waterford CITY. I can only think of a few square metres in the town that could be described as “seedy”. I can assure the reader that having grown up in Waterford if there was any more seediness to find, my intrepid group of friends would have found it. I kinda wish they’d included some photos of all this licentiousness.
While we’re at it, I’ve found greater need to “take care after dark” in the “cultural centre” that is Kilkenny or the “buzzing with energy” Cork than in Tralee. As for Dublin, I’ve seen more alcohol-related fights in Dublin on my ocassional nocturnal outtings there than many years spent in Waterford and frequent trips abroad. I suppose depending on their mood the writers would thus describe Dublin as “having something for everyone”.
Perhaps the planet is lonely as it’s so goddamn smug.

Maybe it’s something in the water. Maybe too much sun is killing their braincells but recent important news events have called into question the state of education in North Carolina and South Carolina. First there was this fluffy link from Damien Mulley. I know that beauty pageants don’t require mensa-level reasoning skills but listen to the attempts of this beauty pageant winner to answer a simple question a few times to gauge the sheer vacuousness.
Then there’s this link from El Reg.
This North Carolina kid tried to cool down his XBox 360 power supply unit (more on this later) by putting it in a basin of water, while it was plugged in. Luckily enough he’s still alive with only minor burns.

Some of you may have seen this before but I picked it up from the tube in the usual viral manner (“look at this” emails). It’s an aspiring Nurburgring racer who’s simply not very good at all, managing 7 seconds of lapping before spinning out of control.