{"id":738,"date":"2010-06-08T20:43:32","date_gmt":"2010-06-08T20:43:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/gaisan.com\/blogs\/?p=738"},"modified":"2010-06-08T20:45:30","modified_gmt":"2010-06-08T20:45:30","slug":"things-i-learned-from-watching-the-road","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/gaisan.com\/blogs\/?p=738","title":{"rendered":"Things I learned from watching The Road"},"content":{"rendered":"

I think it’s fair to say The Road<\/a> isn’t the most optimistic movie made over the past few years. It’s certainly thought provoking about life in a post-apocalyptic future. I viewed it as a learning experience which could save me a lot of time, unpleasantness and limbs in the event of an apocalypse. Here are some important lessons I learned from watching this movie.<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. NAMA<\/a> is a waste of time and money.<\/li>\n
  2. Nobody bothers to look behind them in a post-apocalyptic future<\/li>\n
  3. You won’t need to describe anything as “bleak”. It’s a given!<\/li>\n
  4. There’s a light somewhere that needs to be “kept alive”<\/em>. It’s unclear whether it’s battery or mains operated.<\/li>\n
  5. Coke will finally win its long battle with Pepsi for cola supremacy. It’s not so much “The Real Thing”<\/em> as the “Only Thing”<\/em> if you want to quench your post-apocalyptic thirst<\/li>\n
  6. Nobody will need to “wear suncreen”<\/a><\/em>. The entire cosmetics industry will be unnecessary in a world without bars, nightclubs, parties and sunlight<\/li>\n
  7. Republicans will take their revenge against Democrats by _eating_<\/strong> them. On the plus side there’ll be no more Fox News<\/li>\n
  8. If someone invites you “round for dinner”<\/em>. Refuse!<\/li>\n
  9. We won’t have to worry about “peak oil”<\/a> cos there won’t be any cars.<\/li>\n
  10. Names will no longer be used. This could get confusing but you won’t meet anyone else for 80% of your post-apocalyptic future so it won’t matter. When you eventually meet someone \u00a0they’re more likely to try to eat you than make friends.<\/li>\n
  11. Social media won’t seem very important without food, water, safety, hope etc. \u00a0Industry analysts will admit that Facebook was overvalued.<\/li>\n
  12. Judging by the ash, lack of sunlight and planes, that damn Icelandic volcano caused it all!<\/li>\n
  13. Gartner got it WRONG. Didn’t see this coming in any “magic quadrant”<\/a><\/li>\n
  14. The earth’s population will be decimated but there will be a shortage of clothes<\/li>\n
  15. Apocalypses don’t need coherent causes or effects. For example, despite a lack of sunlight and an obviously cold environment, trees will randomly catch fire.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Feel free to add your own!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    I think it’s fair to say The Road isn’t the most optimistic movie made over the past few years. It’s certainly thought provoking about life in a post-apocalyptic future. I viewed it as a learning experience which could save me a lot of time, unpleasantness and limbs in the event of an apocalypse. Here are […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/gaisan.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/738"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/gaisan.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/gaisan.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/gaisan.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/gaisan.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=738"}],"version-history":[{"count":16,"href":"http:\/\/gaisan.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/738\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":753,"href":"http:\/\/gaisan.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/738\/revisions\/753"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/gaisan.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=738"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/gaisan.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=738"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/gaisan.com\/blogs\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=738"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}